For all potential internet perverts
2:52 p.m. x May 15, 2006
Some pervo on myspace won't leave me alone. He's messaged me in the past and I ignored him, but I got to wondering if he was this asshole that took off with the cart when Kimberley was a baby so I messaged to ask if he had worked at a certain grocery store in the past. If he had said yes, I would have told him off, but he said no. Then he kept messaging me like I wanted to be his friend. Then I added him to my yahoo, only because internet pervos are fun to fuck with, and he kept making comments like "Well if you were single...." I'm not, fucko. I'm not going to make myself single for someone like you. I'm not missing anything by being involved with someone. The guy is ugly as homemade sin, and is a 31 year old bag boy that rides a bike. No thanks. I knew instantly what he wanted and that when he said he wanted to get to know me, he meant what was in my pants. He messaged me once a couple of months ago and I ignored him but I wrote out this long entry in my blog about how I'm not available. Also, since I started using MySpace, Louie has been a constant topic of my blogs. If he wanted to get to know me, he would at least try to find out more about me, and wouldn't have been shocked when I said I had a date with Louie tonight. I'm not stupid and I'm not that desperate. I want to tell him off so bad. That brings drama though and I'm not in the mood. Oh well. I'll just continue to ignore him and deny his friend requests.
Still, I will copy paste part of the entries that I wrote to find off perverts, just in case it becomes an issue here.
From March 1st
Okay, so this is personal and I'll try to be brief with it because I'm not really sure I like broadcasting this to the whole world but I have my reasons. I have as much of a relationship as I want right now. Probably ever. We see each other twice a week, sometimes more, we do our thing, we cuddle, I go home to my kids and as he would say, things are peaceful. I can have pink carpet in my room and nobody can object because it's too girly. He can hang out with the boys and come and go as he pleases. He's there for me if I need him, and I know that, but I hope he knows that while it's truly appreciated, it doesn't mean I expect anything more of him. It would be the same if the favor needed to be returned. Neither of us is tied down and yet the things that a person craves in the intimacy department are met. I have 2 best friends. He is one of them. I just happen to do naughty things with him. It works for us.
This does not mean I am in the market to meet anyone else. I certainly am not in the market to meet anyone online, whether you live here or 500 miles away. Even if we weren't in the situation we're in, I'm not available. The reason I'm not available has little to do with my present situation. It is a choice I have made and am hell bent on sticking to. If you've looked at my profile and you're still trying to pick me up, you either A) have not read my blog which means that, no matter what you say, you have no true desire to get to know me or B) have read my blog and are a worthless piece of shit, since I (until now) have made it clear that there is a man in my life but have never bothered to explain to what degree, therefore, you'd rather be with someone that was willing to cheat on someone than suffer with a stiff dick. Get a haircut, take a shower, and learn how to spell, get some morals, and maybe a woman will want you. Just leave me out of it. I am not, I repeat, not here to meet men. Got it?
From today
I am involved with someone. I have an out if I were to meet someone else worthy of my time but I choose not to take it because I am A) happy with the person I am seeing right now and B) too damned tired to start a new relationship. I may have a pussy but it's attached to the rest of me and not free for use by anyone on the internet that wants in.
When I met Louie, it was technically online, but that's only because he lived here and I lived in Ohio but he hung out with Jes and Andy. When I truly met him and made the decision that I wanted to be with him, I could see him, touch him, smell him, hear him, and taste him. All five senses. All five of the senses that are missing online. I got to know him, not an emoticon that I associated with him. There was no wishing I could be held. I was held. There was no wishing I could kiss him. I was kissed. He made me laugh. Him. Not some words on the internet. He was real. (Well, still is.) If things didn't work out, and I chose to meet someone else, that's what I would want. Reality. Not fancy words. How do I know the person won't kill me, and if things go okay that way, what if they smell or have rotten teeth or don't look anything like the picture they sent, or they claim to be something personality-wise that they're not. No thanks. Please go prowl somewhere else.