May your steak be burnt and your bread be moldy
2:35 a.m. x 2003-07-29
I made it back home but just barely.
The trip went okay and I spent a lot of quality time with my mom. It was nice. Boring, but nice too.
The ride out there wasn't bad. It seemed to take forever to get out of Ohio but once I did, the trip went fairly quickly.
My brakes had started squealing so I had to borrow Ron's van. I'm not used to driving any minivan but I hate his. The steering seems really loose and with most minivans, trucks, and vans, when the wind catches it, it tries to blow the vehicle off the road.
Anyway, I'm out there and I drive around with my mom and we go shopping and eating and all that stuff I always do with my mom, and on the way out to dinner, I notice that the van is squealing a lot when I turn corners, like there's a low tire or it needs to be sligned, something like that. We're sitting there eating, and the waitress comes over and tells me that there's a van outside with a really low tire and is it mine. I go look, and sure enough, there's an almost flat tire. There was still enough air in it to drive on it, so I took it 2 doors down to a gas station, drove around looking for air and couldn't find it, then this guy honks and gets my attention, and he fills it up. Well, it held pretty good qhile I took my mom home and went to the hotel (which was the 5th one I tried because they were all booked for 2 religious conventions that brought a total of 34,000 people to town) and I settled in for the night, made some phone calls, and went to sleep.
Well, I got up in the morning and the tire was flat. I went to use the phone, and I couldn't get an outside line, so I called and asked the front desk guy if my $10 phone deposit had been used up and he said that the computer shut the phone off because there was a $21 phone bill. Yes, folks, that's right. One call to Ohio and a few very brief phone calls to Minnesota, plus one to information, cost me $21 for one night. Glad I don't have phone bills like that at home. I'd go without.
Anyway, I go pay the money, and ask him about tire places, and the guy suggests pep boys, so I called my mom to let her know that the tire went flat and then tried to call pep boys but it was really early (6:15 am) and they weren't open yet. I called Ron to ask him what to do and see if he had a spare somewhere that I hadn't looked and he swore there was a regular tire (not a donut spare) on the right hand side, inside the van, but there was no jack.
So, I called Jeff, my old next door neighbor from the apartment on Rockton, and he came over to fix my tire. I went outside and he told me to look at the "tire" in the van. Well, there was no tire and just one of those factory issued jacks, and there was a donut spare under the van. Luckily he had a plug kit and soapy water and one of those air compressors tha tplugs into the cigarette lighter, and he was able to fix the tire.
I think I would have been better of fwith squealing brakes but too late now. I have to mail him the $10 because he refused to take it right then in case something bad happened. He tossed a can of fix a gflat in the back and told me that I could get a cop to put on the spare if I had to.
Well, anyway, I spent a few more hours with my mom and headed home at 8 last night. I was going to leave in the morning, but decided once I got out there that I may as well just drive overnight and save myself the extra night's hotel cost since I wouldn't see my mom after Sunday night anyway.
Going through Chicago, I almost took the wrong road and missed the skyway, causing me to get stuck in the far left lane and I couldn't get over so this guy sits behind me honking (duh, if I could get out, I would) fonally the lane cleared and I got over and onto the skyway. That was horrible. I was scared to death that I wasn't gonna get that thing between the cement barricades on either side (even though there was a semi in front of me that had plenty of room) and I was afraid that my tire was going to go flat. I worried about that tire all the way back.
There was some guy behind me just inside of Indiana, and he was flashing his brights at me and turning on his signal. Of course I wasn't sure if he was being a jerk or if my tire was low and the bumps on the road were really the tire.. especially after the guy that had him blocked in went by and he could have passed me. I pulled over and checked and I'd just like to say this, in case this guy happens to stumble onto my diary someday:
You're a fuckin idiot. I was going almost 75 so you obviously intended to speed which is illegal, it's illegal to flash your lights to tell someone to move over, and you had the room to pass me so I assume you were afraid that you were going to get in trouble if a cop saw you passing on the right. Like I said, you're an idiot and your passenger needs to keep his staring eyes to himself. I could see if I was going 50 or something but since I was speeding and you had room to go around, you obviously got your license out of a cracker jack box. If anything would have happened to me or my kids because I had to pull over to make sure there was nothing wrong with the van in the middle of the night on a dark road, I would have hunted you down and chopped off your nuts, then busted out the brights in your car with your stiff, useless cock that I chopped off while I was at it.
Anyway, I stopped at a reststop at about midnight and got coffee and no-doz, and then I got so tired that I couldn't hardly see straight, so I pulled over into another rest stop. I didn't realize how tired I was til I was in the back of the van peeing in a cup and someone honked their horn, caused me to look up, and think the van had moved on its own because I didn't remember parking in the middle of the lot. I sat there and drank coffee for a while til I got my eyes open and the no-doz kicked in, then continued on my way.
I pulled off again to check the tire in Ohio and it was fine so I ended up getting in at about 4:30. I was making kissy faces at the Summit County and Akron signs. It was a long night and I was high on no-doz.
Ron called in to work and took the kids and I went to sleep. I slept til 2:00 and then went to work a couple of hours later. Work wasn't bad. I'll be staying on evenings because they moved Ron to first shift for good, and I'm going to miss the kids' bedtime ritual when I'm not here, but it all works out. Since one place hired too many people for during the day, and the other place needs more help in the evenings since a couple of people quit, they don't care.
I swear though.. it wasn't at all busy tonight but every stuffed shirt asshole in town went out to eat tonight. They wanted their water a certain temperature, their dressing on the side, thier food perfect, and when I smiled and gave them everything they wanted in a perfect amount of time, they left me tips that were like 7% or some shit. You don't go to places like that, order steak, and expect to get away with leaving $2. The sad thing is that people with kids that don't really look like they'd have the spare money for tips leave more than what's recommended. If they stiffed me, I'd be understanding of it, but these rich bastards that have nothing to do but bitch about free water because it isn't cold enough can go to hell. (The glass felt cold to me and it was sweaty and had plenty of ice in it, but I swear someone still said it wasn't cold enough.)
Maybe I'll cut off their male members and break out their headlights instead of that guy from last night.